White People: The Middle East is so barbaric. They’ll cut off a person’s hand just for stealing!
White People when an unarmed black kid is murdered by police in America: Yeah, but he shoplifted some cigarillos, so…
never let your printer know that you waited until the last minute to print something and you’re in a hurry. they can sense fear
I wish my friends would take random pictures of me when we hang out because I’m an arrogant prick and I want more pictures of myself that aren’t selfies.
Someone finally said it
cat: places paw tentatively on boob
cat: presses paw down on boob
cat: slowly, agonizingly walks across boobs
THAT’S SO PRECIOUS
shoutout to people who know where they want to be in the future because that shit is scary